Why ‘This Blogging Business?’

When I started this blog I didn’t really know what I was doing (ahem… still don’t) and I imagined a much older and grumpier version of myself sitting at the computer trying to figure it all out. “Bah humbug… what’s this blogging business all about!?”

And so a blog was born.

Why Personal Development?

Once again, I was coming at it from the point of view of my grumpy old woman self. I was getting grumpy because I’ve pursued and read about and ‘tried’ personal development for years. Years! Heck, it’s now been decades.

And yet, here I was still not financially successful, still working at a job which isn’t in an area I’m passionate about, still don’t know WHAT my passion is, unfit and more overweight than I’d ever been in my life.

I’m not a dumb person, I’m pretty smart. I did well at school, I read a lot, can hold a semi-intelligent conversation. So why has this stuff been so elusive? Why can’t I maintain good habits? Why can’t I stop eating junk? Why is regular exercise so damn hard? Why does my money not work as hard for me, as I worked for it?

Am I the only one that feels like this?

I suspect not. I suspect that there are thousands out there who are just like me. You want better for your life. You know there IS better. You’ve tried to BE better. And yet your efforts seem to equal nought.

So this blog has a two-fold purpose:

  1. To help me in my own personal development journey.
    By writing about what I’m going through I have to order my thoughts sensibly and be clear about what I’m trying to achieve. And by putting it on the blog I have a growing group of people to which I am accountable… even if only due to my pride.
  2. To help others (you?) who are as frustrated as me.
    By giving you ‘actual’ help, not just a list of ’12 things to make you a better person’ type of bullshit. By letting you know that you’re not alone; and hopefully growing this into a community of like-minded people who can help each other with moral support, some wise words and healthy dose of accountability.

The Girl Behind the Blog

AboutMeCollage.001I’m Michelle, and I think I’m mostly normal…

There’s nothing out of the ordinary about me. I’m just a normal woman, with a normal job, living in a normal city, with a normal life.

There are a couple of interesting things about me… but they’re still normal.

We live in a converted garage. Yep, with rent prices here in Auckland (New Zealand), it makes sense for us to live in a garage that’s been converted in to a one bedroom dwelling. Rent is only $265 per week and we don’t have to share walls with any other residents. The people that live in the house are lovely (and quiet) and it makes for a nice living situation.

We’ve been married nine years now and have been trying for a baby for about five of those years. Last year we went through two rounds of IVF. I have very bad endometriosis and I’m now in my forties.

I play roller derby. This is probably the thing I’m most proud of. It’s a full on sport that involves a big dose of fitness, agility and mental toughness. I’ve only been playing for two years now and I did have to give it up for the last 6 months when work and IVF just meant my schedule was too crazy to fit the 8 hours of team trainings per week. But I’m back now, and my first focus is on getting back to some semblance of fitness.

I’m a Maori. Obviously that’s normal to everyone in New Zealand… but I get the impression that sometimes the rest of the world thinks we (Maori) still live in grass huts and eat each other. (We don’t)

I’ve started this blog because even though sometimes I feel like I’m the only person that is like me, I’m sure there are others that feel the same way as I do.

What is it I’m feeling?

That there must be something more to life than the endless get up, go to work, come home, cook dinner, go to bed, get up, go to work…

I quite like my job, it’s certainly the most enjoyable job I’ve ever had but still, it’s a job. It’s not my passion or purpose (even though I don’t know what my passion and purpose are anyway.) But I don’t want to spend 48 weeks of the year in this routine, waiting for the 4 weeks of holidays that I look forward to.

Yes I know there are other things that we can do in life to bring fulfilment. Helping others, being involved in sports or hobbies, study, having children (!), travel, volunteering and more. But I don’t want to have to keep trying to fit all these good things in my life around this HUGE part of my life called ‘a job’.

Surely there must be others out there who feel the same way?

I spend far too much of my time reading about the people in this world that have the life that I want to live.

They’ve worked for it.

They’ve sacrificed the not-so-important so that they could build the really-important.

And they’ve even mapped out the way for me.

And I have continued to go back to their blogs and podcasts and consume the dream that they have been showing me.

I’ve never wished that I could be them. But I have wished for so long, that I could get off my ass and do some work just like they have.

This blog is me getting off my ass…

Here I plan to record my journey of self-development. Getting my mindset right, in order to take the actions required, to change my life, and get free.